My lover Buck and I arrived at the party, planning on dancing in each other’s arms all night. It didn’t quite work out that way.
First, Buck decided to take an early flight (1). Since I was still preheating (2), I told him I’d meet him on the dance floor.
By the time I found Buck, he was docking (3) with a cleaned-out (4) boy who was gorilla dancing (5) like he’d spent all day as the recipient of a PISS line (6). Before my lover could dock with Helen Keller (7), I managed to warn him of his possible double-dipping (8).
He came to, bottle-locked (9) and dizzy. Losing Buck’s attention, the boy excused himself for a minute, which I knew would turn into a dinger (10). With the help of buddy-thinking (11), I was able to let Buck know he almost committed a deja-blew (12). He knew we wanted a fresh tri-scuit (13) that night, but still decided on a tea-break (14) to look for his boy.
Finding them both in high tide (15), I decided to go buy another vowel (16) and take a test drive (17).
(1) take an early flight: The act of getting buzzed too early
(2) preheating: Biding one’s time between ingestion and buzz
(3) docking: When two or more mutually attracted men non-verbally dance toward each other
(4) cleaned-out: Describes someone that has spent intimate time with a Fleet bottle
(5) gorilla dancing: Big, dorky buff boy swaying back and forth
(6) PISS: (Progressive Incremental Sphincter Stimulation) - A technique used when more than one top is servicing a single bottom; the tops are ordered starting from the smallest to the largest
(7) Helen Keller: The guy who blindly plows his way through the dance floor once he spots his dealer
(8) double-dipping: Having sex with the same trick twice
(9) bottle-locked: Getting an empty plastic water bottle stuck between your feet
(10) dinger: A boy who excuses himself to go to the bar and does not return
(11) buddy-thinking: The act of using two or more brains to complete a thought or sentence
(12) deja-blew: The point at which you realize you’ve already had sex with the person you just had sex with
(13) tri-scuit: An appetizer for a couple that has sex with others
(14) tea-break: The period of time your boyfriend is missing when he says he’s going to the bathroom
(15) high tide: What happens when the toilets overflow; also known as a water closet waterfall
(16) buy another vowel: As in "e"
(17) test drive: Going to a sex party the night before a major Circuit event