Resident Evil - Apocalypse (Special Edition)
Oh Milla Jovovich, what a long journey it?s been. There you are on the screen, always running in torn nylons, always being chased by the unholy ? sweating, exhausted, and just on the verge of giving in. But, the supermodel Milla I know won?t give up. She?s made of steel ? she?s an iron woman. After all, the Milla I know survived ?Return to the Blue Lagoon,? revealing skin like cinematic Kevlar. She can take a punch. But, just like the zombies in her latest shoot ?em up, "Resident Evil 2," if you want to take out Milla, go for the head. From the looks of it, plopping a jaunty safari hat on her head will do.
For those of you not up on all things Milla, this is Russian supermodel who was brave enough to release an album of pixie-ish Kate Bush tunes, so she?s brave enough to take on a legion of the damned, especially when accompanied by the words ?franchise? and ?back-end deal.? Milla has a new vampire film on the way called "Ultraviolet," so she’s running with it. The dead are her friends.
In the ?Resident Evil? films, Milla has finally found her muse ? providing the soul to a character based on a video game. But you ask, ?How can she? Milla?s just a shell herself?? Well, Milla once fronted a band called Plastic With Memory, so she tends to just draw on that experience. Milla figures that sooner or later some genius will learn how to upload talent, so she?s waiting patiently with the video game geeks and tech heads.
?Resident Evil 2? is just more glossily photographed zombies-on-the-lose mayhem, with Milla leading a small band of human survivors out of Raccoon City (Milla has matching eye make-up) that has been effectively quarantined due to an outbreak of the T-Virus which causes the infected to become rabid flesheaters. Think of the Republican convention, but less messy and with hotter chicks.
The film features all of the standard set-pieces ? cornered heroes, unexpected bites, and Milla, wet and naked. The film?s ending promises yet another sequel, and for Milla?s sake, let?s hope there is.
Actually, I hope she takes this one step further and nails an invite to Tyra Banks’ "America’s Next Top Model." Learning to walk down a runway doesn’t impress me. Try dropping the girls in Raccoon City with a crossbow and it’s every bitch for herself. Now that’s a show.