A Haunted House
The unfortunate question that will float through your head if you subject yourself to the unfunny "A Haunted House" will be, did I really just waste 87 minutes of my precious time to watch this drivel? Unoriginal in every way, shape, and form, this rip-off of the "Scary Movie" franchise is too ribald and raunchy even for the fan of such genres.
"A Haunted House" is basically the first 4 "Paranormal Activity" films rolled together but with black actors, fart jokes, offensive racial comments, and dire sexual shenanigans. The jokes fly faster than a speeding bullet but you’ll barely snicker at Marlon Waylans in an S&M leather outfit or his endless scene where he literally takes a dump on the floor.
The "Paranormal Activity" movies and the found-footage genre are ripe for a spoof and that’s just what "A Haunted House" tries to be. Even the once resourceful Waylans, who gets a co-writing credit, doesn’t save the film from drowning in a pool of it own redundancy.
Luckily, there is only one bonus feature to make a viewer sit through, the equally cliché "How to Survive a Paranormal Presence." The cast and crew, tongue-in-cheek of course, take us on a guide of what to do if a ghost haunts your house.
I’d scare the ghost by forcing it to sit through this movie.
"A Haunted House"