With Upcoming Show, Trans Singer Nicole Talbot Finds Truest Self Onstage

"I was publicly funded to go to these private schools, because the public schools didn't have the resources to support me," reports Talbot. "I commuted 1.5 hours each way from Grafton to Beverly and I was in the car longer than I was at school, so my mom and I and our dog moved to Beverly." One can imagine the toll such an ordeal might take on an adolescent who is also grappling with gender identity issues.

Layer on top of that a split in family support. Her mother was and is completely supportive of Talbot's gender identity, but her father was a different story. "He was not supportive of me being trans, and I haven't seen him in 10 years," asserts Talbot. "I turned him away when I was 13 years old. The same year I transitioned, he became a Jehovah's Witness. There was no way to make him happy. No matter what I did, I was doing it wrong, I wasn't doing enough to be a man. When I started molding myself into something different than what he wanted me to be, his religion complex came into play to save me from damnation."

Talbot's struggles didn't end there. While high school was an affirming time for Talbot, both at home and in school, things changed once she entered college." I am not in college at the moment," admits Talbot. "I was at a particular school; they were not supportive of my transgender identity. I left two years ago, and my life fell out from under me. I was studying musical theater and vocal performance. You would think it would be a safe place, but it wasn't."

Musical theater ran through Talbot's veins at a very young age. Talbot loved Disney films as a young child, and when her aunt took her to the National Tour of "Annie," when Talbot was six, she had an epiphany. "I was sitting on the edge of my seat the whole time," cries Talbot. "I said, 'I want to be them; I want to be up there doing that.'" She began classical training and voice lessons at eight years old, and began taking paid work.

Her mother was and is the quintessential stage mom, and very supportive of Talbot's theater career. She drove Talbot to all her auditions, and sat through them, sometimes attracting good-natured taunts from other parents, which she dismissed, saying, "I'm not sitting in the cold and the rain. I get to sit inside where it's warm and listen to beautiful voices all day long." Her mom was in her element supporting Talbot.

Talbot's theater career took unusual turns. Pre-transition, she had performed the role of Young Ebenezer in Hanover Theatre's "A Christmas Carol; post-transition, she performed the role of Martha Cratchit in North Shore Music Theatre's "A Christmas Carol." "When I was a kid, I used theater as an escape to not be myself," recalls Talbot. "Changing over into being a woman and performing as a woman, even though I'm playing a character, it felt more authentic."

As Talbot got more serious about performing, she studied under Broadway actress Krysta Rodriguez ("Addams Family," "Into the Woods" revival). "The piece of advice she gave me, and I keep with me, was, 'Don't sing like a pretty girl','" notes Talbot. "I've taken that to heart. When I'm singing a song that is deeply emotional, I needn't be afraid of being ugly, I don't have to be prim and proper all the time. I can let loose. I've grown into that."

Talbot, with help from her mom, auditioned for "America's Got Talent" and "The Voice," going through multiple stages, passing each audition, going to the next, and being called back numerous times. Things were all set for her to be on both shows in the spring of spring 2020, but COVID meant the cancellation of the 2020 season for both shows, cancelling Talbot's chance at national exposure along with it. "If it's meant for me, it won't pass me by," accepts Talbot. "I've met so many incredible people and producers who helped during that process, and they opened doors for other opportunities."

Some opportunities she fantasizes about include someday playing the first trans Elphaba in "Wicked," a role that resonates for Talbot. "She's made fun of for being a freak of nature, yet she's flying high, 'Defying Gravity'," proclaims Talbot.

One of Talbot's earliest influences is another fictional outsider, the title character in Disney's "Mulan." "I was probably three or four years old, and I recall loving the movie and having a fascination with her," muses Talbot. "My mom and grandfather took me to Disney World, and we spent three and a half days searching for her, and we found her, and I asked her if I could sing her song, and she said, 'Yes,' and I did." In fact, Mulan's song "Reflection" has become somewhat of a signature song for Talbot. It's no wonder, with its prescient lyrics: "Who is that girl I see | Staring straight back at me? | When will my reflection show | Who I am inside?"

"Few little girls loved Mulan, but I did," contends Talbot. "She wasn't being saved by someone, she was saving herself."

Another role model was Laverne Cox. "She launched the trans community into major conversation in the last decade," stresses Talbot.

These public role models, and Talbot's own activism, are important in these times when the trans community is under attack throughout many conservative parts of the U.S. As of November 2023, three in 10 trans youth aged 13-17 are living in states that have passed bans on gender affirming care. This is very concerning for Talbot, for whom such care was lifesaving.

"I have so much fear for my friends where they are passing these anti-trans bills. What's happening in the world now is unprecedented, we are being separated from the rest of humanity and aren't being seen as human," bemoans Talbot. "The worst part: If I didn't have access to the hormone blocker, I wouldn't be here today. I had nightmares of my voice and body changing. I was incredibly young when I had those nightmares. I would wake up in cold sweat after having a dream that my voice had changed. This medical care is saving people's lives."

She believes people involved with anti-trans movements are misinformed about what the treatment is. "This same technology has been used since the '70s and '80s for young children going through precocious puberty, like a girl getting her period in first grade. And it is reversible," counters Talbot. "People think kids are having surgery, and that's not the issue. It's the hormone blocker, and that can be a decision they go through with their parents, their families, and their friends."

Talbot's show will touch upon all these points, even to the show's title, "Thank Heaven for Little Boys/Girls." "There was a sign I had in my house, and my cousins had them, too, hanging over our bedroom doors saying 'Boys,' and when I transitioned, I crossed out 'Boys' and wrote in cursive 'Girls' on top," recounts Talbot. "I've being working hard to find and select songs that are not only deeply personal, but follow an arc just like a musical would. Yes, I will be singing 'Reflections,' but I will also be connecting with my musical theater roots. My vocal coach may come up on stage and perform a song with me. She has completely transformed my voice and helped me regain my confidence after the experience with the school on the north shore."

Wise beyond her years, Talbot is no doubt bolstered by the strength she has had to summon up from a very young age to carve out her own path to become her authentic self. Her show, an expansion of the mini-set she performed last year at Club Café, will no doubt enlighten, move, and entertain.

Contemplating what she wants out of her career and life, Talbot says, "My dream is that transgender youth don't have to worry about discrimination. Instead, all they have to do... is be."

Talbot has been planning this show for nearly a year. She was so excited, 2024 being the 10th anniversary of her transition, that she picked out an outfit six months ago. "The theme is pink. As in Mulan," quips Talbot. "The style of the garment has almost a Marilyn Monroe-type feel when she's over the grate, but with a twist."

Nicole Talbot will perform "Thank Heaven for Little Boys/Girls" Saturday, February 24, 7:30 at Moonshine, Club Café, 209 Columbus Avenue, Boston, MA 02116. Tickets: $30. For reservations, visit: https://www.clubcafe.com/club-events/nicole-talbot-022424/