It's a Bird. It's a Plane. It's a Sky Penis. Report Explains Strange Phenomenon

Wednesday May 15, 2019

Where did the penis in the sky come from?

On November 16, 2017 a huge outline of a penis appeared in the sky near a training area in western Washington at the Naval Air Station on Whidbey Island.

A local television station KREM 2 reported the story after a woman sent along pictures of the sky drawing, along with expressing being upset by the images because she would need to explain them to her young children.

The photos created quite stir with attention paid right up to the Office of the Chief Naval Operations,
reports this week.

"Aircrew maneuvered an EA-18G aircraft in a pattern that resulted in contrails depicting an obscene symbol when viewed from the ground," it warned. "Media attention is expected."

The perpetrators of the sky high prank were revealed to be "the work of two junior officers with the 'Zappers' of Electronic Attack Squadron 130, who had sky time to kill and noticed that the white contrails their jet produced were particularly robust that afternoon.

"But they never counted on those contrails lingering long enough for folks on the ground to see their phallic rendering, according to a copy of the military's sky penis investigation obtained exclusively by Navy Times."

The officers — both lieutenants — were on a standard training mission when one of them came up with the plan for the giant penis, which was captured on the cockpit video recording system.

"What did you do on your flight?" the pilot joked. "Oh, we turned dinosaurs into sky penises."

"You should totally try to draw a penis," his co-pilot advised.

"I could definitely draw one, that would be easy," the pilot boasted. "I could basically draw a figure eight and turn around and come back. I'm gonna go down, grab some speed and hopefully get out of the contrail layer so they're not connected to each other."

They discussed the design as it was being completed.

"Balls are going to be a little lopsided," the pilot advised.

"Balls are complete," he reported moments later. "I just gotta navigate a little bit over here for the shaft."

"Which way is the shaft going?" the EWO asked.

"The shaft will go to the left," the pilot answered.

"It's gonna be a wide shaft," the EWO noted.

"I don't wanna make it just like 3 balls," the pilot said.

"Let's do it," the EWO said. "Oh, the head of that penis is going to be thick."

Once completed, they located a spot where they could view it in full and "cracked up" upon viewing it; but soon realized the gaffe they had made and they attempted to cover it up.

"I remarked that we needed to take steps to try to obfuscate it," the pilot wrote. "I flew one pass over it essentially trying to scribble it out with my contrails. That pass was ineffective."

Upon landing, the pair was confronted as to their actions and the two immediately fessed up and apologized, according to the report that the Navy Times received.

As for being reprimanded, "Navy officials said at the time of the incident that the two would go before a disciplinary board, the investigating officer recommended they receive 'non-punitive letters of instruction," writes Navy Times.

The pair's Executive Officer defended the wayward lieutenants, calling them both "fine officers and capable aviators."

"They 100 percent need to be held accountable, but if they are allowed to continue in naval aviation this is not a mistake they will repeat," he wrote. "Minus the current circumstances, they have never given me a reason to doubt their trustworthiness or their resolve to be officers in the Navy."

One squadron officer statement in the investigation appears to sum up the sentiment of the command regarding the historic act:

"This was a really bad decision by some really good guys in a really good squadron," reported the

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