Satanists Angry that Lucifer Was Compared to Ted Cruz

On Wednesday former Speaker of the House John Boehner called Republican presidential hopeful Ted Cruz "Lucifer in the flesh." None of this sat well with real worshipers of Satan.

"Boehner's comment is illustrative of how well past time it is to adjust our mythologies to reflect our realities," said Satanic Temple spokesperson Lucien Greaves to The Friendly Atheist. "Cruz's failures of reason, compassion, decency, and humanity are products of his Christian pandering, if not an actual Christian faith."

"It grows tedious when pedophile priests and loathsome politicians are conveniently dismissed as Satanic, even as they spew biblical verse and prostrate themselves before the cross, recruiting the Christian faithful. Satanists will have nothing to do with any of them," Greaves concluded.

In February The Daily Beast reported that Cruz's self-purported piety has put him on the top of the Satanists watch list.

"We're really interested in his interpretation of what religious liberty means as one that seems to come across as only applying to Christians pretty exclusively, and how he uses that rhetoric to push an agenda that opposes access to health care for women, for example, or how he continues to promote the concept of traditional marriage on a religious platform as being one of exclusively his own views," Satanic Temple spokesperson Jex Blackmore told The Beast.