Becoming A Man: The Story Of A Transition

P. Carl's memoir "Becoming A Man" documents his process of transitioning from a woman to a man at a time in his life when most men and women would unhappily settle into aging, not adjust to a new and radical puberty. From his first young moments of realization to uncovering the freedom later in his own life to transition, much of the language he uses to describe his experience is open and accepting, and feels inclusive of his entire history. Intertwined with his burning need to transition are also a set of distinct mental health issues and his desire to become a truly good man.

There is no singular transgender experience and while P. Carl wisely only speaks for himself this is not a simple Transgender 101 kind of narrative. In order to appreciate this book, it may be easiest for the reader to perhaps read this in a group setting with friends who are knowledgeable or accept that there may be unfamiliar words and phrases. Carl writes as directly as possible and includes as many transgender and queer touchstones as he can, but not everyone will have the same level of cultural education.

My simplest way of describing this book is to call it a Bildungsroman onion: connected tales of Carl maturing by overcoming distinct episodes of adversity blossoming outward from a centered place, an inner self. While exposition is frequently offered in simple paragraphs and sentences, rarely do the explanations detract from action, external or internal. His descriptions of joy are pleasant and simple, they are full thoughts encapsulated within few words and sentences.

Containing more than just Carl's stories, his relationships with the people closest to him are the key emotional landmarks of his journey. While friendships and important acquaintances warrant occasional mention along his journey, his strongest insights are steeped in his family, chosen and biological, as well as how the media he absorbed forms his personal masculinity. As an American man who wants to be proud of being a man and an American, there are bittersweet compromises he must make as he navigates the changes in his life.

"Becoming A Man"
P. Carl
Simon & Schuster
https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/Becoming-a-Man/P-Carl/9781982105099
$26 (hardcover)