EDGE Interview: Josh Seiter Talks Coming Out as Bi, OnlyFans, and 'Lover Boy' Tour

When Josh Seiter appeared on Season 11 of "The Bachelorette" in 2015, he was amongst the first men sent home by Kaitlyn Bristowe. "Josh and Kaitlyn didn't hit it off and he was eliminated during the first rose ceremony," reported InTouch Weekly.

Five years later he made tabloid headlines by becoming engaging to another reality show personality -- Yolanda Leak, who appeared on "90 Day Fiancé: Before the 90 Days" in 2020. They met in August 2021 and became engaged that October. That November Josh tattooed her name inside his right arm, but things cooled fast between the couple and they were phttt by December.

These may sound like the antics of some publicity-driven influencer, but Seiter has long been serious (and public) about his emotional well-being and has been an outspoken advocate for mental health, telling Digital Journal just this week that "I have spent the last seven years on social media sharing my experiences with anxiety and depression, and much of that has involved listening to my followers relate experiences that are distinctly similar to mine."

This self-reflection led to Seiter And more recently Josh came out as pansexual and announced he is living with a man. "Seiter spoke openly about his sexuality and his refusal to be categorized into a singular label. He told TV Shows Ace that he identifies as pansexual. In another interview with Instinct Magazine, Seiter said he is bisexual."

"The universe seems to always work out in wonderful little ways. Unlike some people, my awareness of my bisexuality manifested later in life," he told Instinct.

He also opened up that he is in a relationship with another exotic dancer, David, whom he's been dating on-and-off since November, 2022.

"The couple worked together as strippers touring the United States and Seiter emphasised that the shared experience had resulted in bringing the pair closer together, increasing the "attraction" between them," the Star Observer added.

"We both make a living taking our clothes off and it's hard not to be turned on by that. He's also young and very driven. Those are qualities I find attractive in anyone, regardless of their gender. David would prefer not to be in the spotlight," Seiter said.

"He prides himself on his masculinity and being a male stripper...This relationship is head and shoulders more healthy than any of my past public relationships. We laugh together, we work together, and do a lot of other things together," Seiter said, calling David his 'partner in crime'.

EDGE spoke with Seiter about his career, his coming out and going public with his private life.

EDGE: Josh, tell us a little bit about who you are.

Josh Seiter: I hail from Chicago, Illinois. I am an exotic dancer, an OnlyFans creator, and a law school graduate.

EDGE: Tell us about your coming out journey.

Josh Seiter: I think it's just kind of the growth that I've had over the years and learning how to operate according to what's true to my heart versus operating how I think the world wants me to. I think so many times in life we do or say things because we think it's what's going to get approval from others. For me, that was definitely the case, and it was heightened because I was homeschooled my whole life. I had a very traditional conservative religious upbringing, so I was conditioned to not really listen to my heart and started living for myself instead of for others. That's when I realized the traditional norms / boxes of heterosexual relationships were just way too small for me and I didn't fit into them. So, I started experimenting and realized that I'm attracted to both men and women.

EDGE: You prefer not to be labeled. Why do you think labels mean so much for some?

Josh Seiter: Great question! I think labels are shorthand. I think a lot of times in life we try to digest a lot of information and then place a label on it because it kind of ameliorates the cognitive dissonance that we have when we see something that we don't understand. I don't think labels are always bad or nefarious. I think they serve and can serve a purpose, but like anything they can be abused.

In the past, I have identified as pansexual, but for me, bisexual is more accurate. I am attracted to multiple genders; whereas pansexual, at least the way I interpret the nuances of it, you are loving someone's soul, which I can identify with also. I feel a strong attraction to multiple sexes and multiple genders, so I think bisexual is more accurate. They're all up for interpretation and I don't claim to fully know, everything or have the dispositive answer on which labels are correct. I think both pansexual and bisexual can apply to me, but if forced to use a label I would choose bisexual.

EDGE: What led to you wanting to make your sexuality public?

Josh Seiter: I think a lot of it has to do with not caring anymore about what people think. A lot of times we self-censor what we do and say out of fear of what others are going to think about us and through Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, which I've been undergoing for the last 20 years, I've learned to restructure my thoughts. It's only recently that I've truly come to unconditional self-acceptance, which is a large part of CBT, which is basically not conditioning your self-worth upon other people's acceptance of you. It really allows you to just live for yourself and be true to yourself and be authentic.

EDGE: Tell us about why raising awareness on mental health is so important to you.

Josh Seiter: I think the two-go hand in hand, sexuality and mental health. I don't think you can really talk about one without talking about the other. A lot of times they just overlap, and I have the same approach to both. I think the more honest, the more transparent, and vocal we can be about our sexuality or mental health issues, the less stigma there is. I think the only way we can get rid of the stigma and stop being invisible sufferers of mental illness and of our sexuality.

I think it's important to be very vocal about these things. It doesn't mean that I am walking around yelling "I'm bisexual, and I have suffer from mental illness." There's are tactful and diplomatic ways of talking about it. Starting a dialogue is the best thing we can do for erasing the stigma around these issues.

EDGE: As a celebrity, how do you control the effects of social media on your mental health.

Josh Seiter: It's a very delicate balancing act. I guess the short answer to a very good question is make sure you take everything you see or read with a grain of salt. You also have to know when to shut it off and just be present in the real world. Removing yourself won't cure everything. It's not a panacea. It's not going to magically make everything be good again, but I think if you can do that you will help yourself mentally. At least for me in my journey, I have to constantly remind myself that it is just social media.

EDGE: What has the OnlyFans experience been like for you. What can one expect to see on your page?

Josh Seiter: The OnlyFans experience for me has been very rewarding. I started it in April of 2018. I started it at a great time when it was kind of still in its beginning stages. I've stayed between the top 1% and 10% in those five years. Right now, I'm in the top 2.5% of all the creators. It's been great, but it's also something that can be a cause stress and anxiety. You have to be very careful as a creator that you're not just putting everything out there. I think a lot of people are under the impression that if they create an OnlyFans page that they have to be fully naked or be performing porn. I was very lucky that I had a mentor who taught me that the less you give, the better you'll do. There's something to be said about leaving some things a mystery. My posts are tactful and artistic. I leave a lot up to people's inquisitive minds and to the mystery of it all and that's what keeps them coming back. I think OnlyFans can devour you and it can be terrible for somebody's life if not handled correctly.

EDGE: As a former bachelor, is the franchise ready for a same-sex show?

Josh Seiter: I don't think they are. The franchise carters to a certain demographic of people - middle-aged straight housewives that want something soapy to watch. They're slowly becoming a little more progressive, but not enough to make any major changes. About 7% of people in America identify as LGBTQI+, that's about 25 million people. So, 25 million people effectively have been left out and not represented in the franchises 20 some seasons. I don't have a lot of faith that they're going to do something like that.

EDGE: Anything you would like to promote? Any new projects?

Josh Seiter: I am headlining the America's Lover Boys National Tour. We're a male review group of five guys and it's very similar to Magic Mike. We tour the country mostly in Michigan, Wisconsin, Illinois, Chicago, and Indiana. A portion of the proceeds goes to help local animal shelters in the area in which we're performing. We also ask the local animal shelter to come to the show and set up a booth and we ask the attendees to bring in food donations for the animals. Tickets to America's Lover Boys Tour are available on Eventbrite (at the above link), and there's a great description for all our shows of what we do.

For more on Josh Seiter, visit his Instagram.