New Year's Eve

Don't have plans yet for New Year's? Well hookers, I have the "hook-ups" for you. Whether you prefer a quiet bar party, or wish to be the toast of the town, check out the following nightclubs and get ready to usher in 2015! I've got naked men, drag queens, baubles, bangles and beads. Champagne will flow and there will be plenty of "ho-ho-hoeing," so put on your best frock and tiniest "enhancing" undies, as you prepare to "get down" in Tinseltown.

The Abbey celebrates New Year's Eve with this year's theme: "Heaven - Fallen Angels." The bar will be transformed into a heavenly, cloud-like paradise, complete with golden gates at the entrance. Dancers and bartenders will be the "fallen angels" for the night, and Candis Cayne will host the festivities and a countdown at midnight. $20 cover. The Abbey is at 692 North Robertson Boulevard in L.A., for more information go to abbeyfoodandbar.com.

Avalon Hollywood brings the super DJ group BlasterJaxx (love the name) all the way from Holland, to spin for what will be a great mixed house of music lovers. BlasterJaxx has dropped three #1 dance tracks in 2014 including "Smash," "Mys- tica" and "Titan." If you love Eurodance music, see them at one of the coolest venues in America. Avalon is located at 1735 Vine Street in Hollywood. For more information go to avalonhollywood.com.

Dragonfly hosts "Bearracuda" on New Year's Eve, so if you love bears, cubs, otters and manly men, get down and enjoy DJs Matt Consola, Paul Goodyear and Ryan Jones. Come and celebrate 2015 with a room filled with hot, sweaty furries. Dragonfly is at 6510 Santa Monica Boulevard in Hollywood, for more information go to thedragonfly.com.

Gym Sports Bar, is keeping it real with a low-key celebration; they do something really special, however. They have a "New Year's Eve Champagne Toast" at midnight on Eastern Standard Time to celebrate with their New York City bar and a second toast to celebrate at Pacific Standard Time. Not many bars can "ring in the New Year" on both coasts, so be sure to arrive early enough to imbibe in both time zones and enjoy some great music and sexy, super bartenders too! The rest is all just a matter of dropping balls. Gym Sports Bar is located at 8737 Santa Monica Boulevard in West Hollywood, for more information go to gymsportsbar.com.

Hamburger Mary's "WeHo" offers drag and comedy for their New Year's Eve Party hosted by comedian and singer, Wendy Ho. Mary's is the drag capital of WeHo and is a terrific place to usher in the New Year and is sure to be accompanied by the wonderful, wacky and absurd. Midnight will bring a Champagne toast, balloon drop and more sparkles than a mirror ball. Mary's WeHo is at 8288 Santa Monica Boulevard, for information go to hamburgermarys.com/weho.

Oxwood Inn is one of the San Fernando Valley's oldest bars and for New Year's Eve, the only party for TS girls and their admirers in the L.A. area. Join Club Shine for the always-gorgeous transgender, cross-dressing and femme guys' party! Included with your $15 admission, Champagne toasts and DJ. The Oxwood is at 13713 Oxnard Street in Van Nuys, for more information go to theoxwood.wix.com/theox.

Motherlode is one of WeHo's long-standing neighborhood bars. It is unpretentious, yet fun, though as they say, "There are no ugly people in West Hollywood." Champagne will abound during their New Year's celebration. Motherload is at 8944 Santa Monica Boulevard in West Hollywood, you can find more information by calling them at 310.659.9700.

Rage Nightclub teams with super lesbian party producers Juicy to produce WeHo's biggest girl party for New Year's Eve, with two rooms, two female DJs and lady Go-Go dancers to party all night. This is where all the lesbian ladies will be rocking out this N.Y.E.! With bottle service and a Champagne toast, Rage has it all covered this year! Rage Nightclub is at 8911 Santa Monica Boulevard in West Hollywood. Check out all the "Juicy" details at juicyclubla.com.

Enjoy the wild New Year's festivities in the wilds of West Hollywood and Los Angeles. The bars and clubs described above include places for drag queens, t-girls, lesbians, hot naked men, bears, places to dance the night away and a few quaint and friendly holiday bars. Needless to say, I get around.

Drink responsibly and remember, take a cab or assign a designated driver.